Wow! I just got back from the Global Student Council Cookies And Speeches Forum, and I can honestly say that I'm moved. All the students running for an office gave a speech about why they'd like to serve; and the passion and length of the meeting was roughly equivalent to that of the movie Braveheart. It was extremely compelling, featuring many ideas that I'd never thought about before, and which I now regret not having more space in my head for. There was a capacity crowd assembled to watch presidential hopefuls galore talk about ideas out the wazoo.
Now. I made it a whole paragraph with a fairly serious mein, but I have to leave such things to other people. I have a hard time- stemming from existential ideals- focusing on politics and politicacl ideals; and as a "big picture" thinker, I have a hard time knowing which steps represent progress, and which steps are just steps; I can see the beginning and the end, but sometimes I can't see the middle. I highly respect all the candidates, and everybody that is capable of staking themselves to an idea of tangible "progress"; but on the other hand, I'll have to examine the candidates very carefully while realizing that I might be dissatisfied with my vote five minutes after I've cast it. So, having absolved myself from a sort of civic guilt creeping up on me, I will now deliver the speech I would give were I running for president:
Dear everybody,
What's up? Now, I know that some of you are expecting, like, ideals and ideas; but I'm not really about that. And I'm not just saying that so when I finally reveal my ideals, you all will be disarmed and impressed; I'm saying that because there's not one single platform that you can really hold me to. Will I go to every meeting? Possibly. Will I make changes? It depends. As they say, "there's no need to reinvent the wheel unless it's raining cats and dogs and you're stuck in a rut."
Here are a couple of facts about me: I'm a Sagitarius. I don't really know what that says about my personality, but I totally dig it when people tell me what it says about my personality. Um, I'm into writing and reading; and I guess if "I will read books during my presidency" is a platform, then I'll have to retract my previous, groundless, statement about having no platform. Hahahahahaha. You see, a platform is sort of something you stand on, and if my claims about it were groundless... No...? No one?
Ahem. Hmm. Ahem, ah, um, anyway. As an unknown, but undoubtedly wise, man once said, "A journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step. And maybe a platform; you can't journey anywhere without something to stand on, right?"...
...Okay, seriously, guys? I just told you what makes that joke funny, and then I said it again. Nothing? Not even some pity applause? What's that? No, I haven't meditated today, for your information. Is that a problem? No, I don't need a drink of water, I'm fine I don't need to sit down.
Alright, you know what? Lemme just finish my concl... okay, but before I do that, could people just raise their hands if they got my joke? Somebody had to at least GET that joke. Anybody? No. Okay... o... Okay, you know what? I really just ran for office so I could tell that joke. That's really all I've got. So, could I just tell it again and you all can laugh and pretend that you get it? Yeah?
Alright. So, I'm really into reading and writing and... ah, you know what? It's just not the same. I'm gonna go play some frisbee, enjoy the rest of the speeches.
So all in all, it's probably a good thing that we have people different from me running for office. I'm really excited about the direction we're going, and the next couple years are going to be interesting.
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